Showing up in life in the NOW
Fast forward, again I was functioning like in those days of grade school, a lot on my plate, looking like I was doing it, but actually drowning! I continued to drink a few times a week and mostly socially. Yet still felt stuck, still felt amiss. On December 30, 2018 I decided “I am done drinking for a year.” “I am done wondering what life is like without it.” “I am done.”
I drank once one February 15, after that I knew I had to make a clean, clear cut decision, I am done. I could not have it both ways in order to stay consistent.
I talked with two very dear friends almost daily for 2 months. The first 21 days were the hardest. I had to really honest so that meant I had to be really honest with myself. I pretty much shut myself off from the world for 10 months. I wasn’t showing up but for what was required of me.
I began to notice people, events, activities showing up in my life that supported me in my sobriety. My husband, my parents, my friends were incredibly supportive when I told myself a story of uncertainty around this to only find out it was a lie.
Life slowly but surely moves into a state of homeostasis. I made the decision to go to Bali. I really started to invest myself into my coaching business, I said yes to coaching. My family began to grow and blossom in a new beautiful way. My kids and I were closer and everyone seemed calmer.
I continue to make the life choice to be sober. I have had my favorite beer, I thoroughly enjoyed drinking it and thoroughly enjoyed leaving it at one. I will continue to grow in the beauty of the struggle and open my heart to what my future holds.
Come as you are convo
How do we choose sobriety in a society that thoroughly glamorizes and necessitates use?
*make a list of trying new things
*ask yourself what will substance give me at this moment I am seeking
*go back to your agreements within yourself, would you hold up an agreement with someone else, than why would you not hold up an agreement with yourself
*find a mentor, a sponsor, an accountability partner, work a program
*be crystal clear around the intentions of your actions, what drives me to seek sobriety, is that enough for me to make the right choice any given moment
*hold yourself in the highest heights of compassion and grace!!!!!! LOVE YOURSELF EVERY STEP OF THE WAY